An Irish Mob Boss and a Presbyterian Minister Walk Into a River
Dear individual at Netflix whose job it is to acquire content,
Please buy the movie rights to A River Runs Through It. It’s my favorite movie, and I can’t seem to find it anywhere on your platform. Though I enjoy some of the other content, my favorite movie is nowhere to be found. When I search for the movie, you make other recommendations, some of which have nothing to do with my initial search. You’ll need to remedy this flaw if you want to keep me as a subscriber.
Where’s My Money Going?
I’ve tried my best to think about this from your perspective, but I can’t seem to understand why a movie so important to me is not available on a streaming platform which I continue to financially support. As a side note, if you’re the person who also decides what to do with my money each month, I’d like you to direct part of it to buying the rights to my favorite movie and then spend the rest of it on content creation (if there’s anything left over, get yourself something nice).
The Case for Redford
In case you’re questioning whether or not A River Runs Through It is well-known enough to stream, let me construct a foolproof argument.
Robert Redford.
And if that’s not enough of an argument to convince you, I’m not sure any amount of reasoning will suffice. But just in case you’re someone who struggles to absorb sound logic, I’ll add two more irrefutable layers:
Brad Pitt and Tom Skerritt.
If that’s not enough to convince you, I withdraw my offer to buy something nice for yourself with my leftover subscription money.
A Search Gone Wrong
While I have your attention with the money I’m waving around, I have a few other suggestions to help grow your platform. First, please acquire the movie A River Runs Through It.
Second, you’ll notice when I search for the movie A River Runs Through It (directed by Robert Redford and starring Tom Skerritt and Brad Pitt) that you have a number of suggestions for me. The first suggestion you offer is Brad Pitt’s second-best movie, Legends of the Fall, which is filmed in Alberta and British Columbia, just north of Montana, the shooting location of his best movie, A River Runs Through It.
When you suggested this movie, I initially thought aha — Netflix does know about my favorite movie. A difficult reality hit me when I started viewing the second recommendation: a series called Squid Game.
Trout vs. Squid
The two are nothing alike, which led me to question my assumption that you’re aware that A River Runs Through It is narrated by Robert Redford.
I know it’s your platform and you can do what you want, but I’d like to make another observation. A River Runs Through It is about trout and people who fish for trout. Squid Game is not about people who fish for squid, so I’m not sure what prompted you to make this suggestion.
Just in case you’re unaware, because it must be difficult to keep track of all your content, Squid Game is a series, has gratuitous amounts of violence and death, is dystopian, and does not feature Brad Pitt or Craig Sheffer. In my favorite movie, there’s one death that’s integral to the plot. In Squid Game, there’s 255 in one episode. That seems like a pretty thin thread to base a recommendation on.
Thank you, by the way. There are scenes I can’t unsee, and you kind of ruined my fond childhood memories of Red Light Green Light.
Longmire, Mobsters, and Fly Fishing
Not to get too bogged down in numbers and details, but I did notice that your platform has an awareness of fly fishing because of a particular series you feature. After Legends of the Fall, you likely should have recommended the series Longmire. Though it has very few similarities to my favorite movie, it’s far more comparable than Squid Games.
Longmire features vast landscapes and a number of fly-fishing scenes. Though… and not to sound like I’m constantly complaining… I’m concerned about the confusion it might create for anyone who watches the series who doesn’t know a lot about fly fishing. The characters who fly fish the most seem to be Irish mob bosses. I’m not saying that Irish mobsters can’t fly fish, but I’m guessing they just don’t make up the majority of fly anglers.
Two Dead Bodies in the River
Just a couple of other suggestions regarding fly-fishing scenes in Longmire. In one scene, a fly angler discovers two dead bodies in the river. For future content creation, can you hold off on this? I’m not saying it doesn’t happen, but it’s not something fly anglers necessarily like to focus on. You might say it’s an unspoken worst fear amongst the fly-fishing community.
Don’t get me wrong. Not all fly anglers have to be Presbyterian Ministers like Reverend John McLean (played by Tom Skerritt) in my favorite movie, which I can’t watch on your platform, but maybe feature a little more diversity in your fly anglers than Irish mobsters. It’s a niche pastime, and the Irish mobster might be a niche within a niche.
Casting Doubles Matter
I noticed in Longmire, you didn’t appear to use casting doubles. For future reference, I assume it’s quite difficult for an actor to act like they can cast a fly rod. It’s likely far easier for them to act like they’re angry, sad, or happy. Consider using casting doubles like they did in A River Runs Through It.
Please disregard my previous suggestion if you were trying to create the illusion that the Irish mobsters were using fly fishing as a front and that they weren’t actually trying to catch fish. If this were the case, you fully accomplished that. Not only were they sub-par casters, they were also fishing in river sections where they were highly unlikely to catch a trout.
Where Trout Actually Live
If you want to see examples of stream sections where trout are likely to reside, watch A River Runs Through It. Some of the runs Brad’s casting double fishes will give you a good idea about portions of a river to feature when creating fly-fishing scenes.
A heads-up, though. You won’t be able to watch the movie on Netflix. I’ve already tried that. Please don’t pirate it online. That would be illegal and unfair to the artists. If you’ve run out of options (because I assume, as an employee of Netflix, you can’t subscribe to other streaming services), you can come over to my house to watch it. I’ve got the movie on DVD and on VHS (but that copy is in the crawl space, so you’ll have to give me a heads-up if you want me to dig it out).
Sincerely,
Derek Bird, Founding Editor, Fly Fusion
